It’s Not Bad Luck — It’s a Red Flag
Friday the 13th has a longstanding reputation for bad luck. Broken mirrors. Jinxes. Things going wrong for no clear reason.
But when it comes to relationships, especially around Valentine’s Day, what people often call “bad luck” is actually something much more concrete: ignored warning signs.
Unhealthy dynamics don’t appear because of unlucky timing. They show up through patterns that are easy to dismiss, excuse, or romanticize, particularly during a week that puts so much pressure on relationships to look happy and solid.
Valentine’s week can make people override their instincts. There’s an unspoken expectation that relationships should feel good right now: in short, that love should be visible, celebratory, and uncomplicated.
So, when something feels off, it’s tempting to tell yourself:
I’m just stressed.
It’s the holiday pressure.
This is probably nothing.
Discomfort isn’t superstition, though. It’s information.
One of the most common red flags people overlook is emotional unpredictability. If affection feels inconsistent — warm one moment, distant or sharp the next — it can create confusion that gets mistaken for intensity or passion.
This inconsistency often keeps people trying harder, hoping the “good version” of the relationship will return.
Related: The Cycle of Abuse, Explained
Another red flag that gets brushed off around Valentine’s Day is pressure. Pressure to define the relationship. Pressure to show up a certain way. Pressure to prove commitment through time, access, or emotional labor.
For teens and young adults especially, this pressure is often framed as romance, but when saying no creates conflict or guilt, that’s not closeness. That’s control.
Digital behavior is another place where red flags hide in plain sight. Expectations around constant texting, sharing passwords, or explaining online interactions often increase during Valentine’s week, especially when couples compare themselves to what they see on social media.
If being offline causes anxiety or conflict, that’s worth noticing.
Related: Social Media Relationship Pressure: Red Flags to Watch For
Friday the 13th is associated with intuition. You know, that feeling you get deep inside that something isn’t quite right. In relationships, intuition often shows up quietly, long before anything dramatic happens.
You might feel:
tense instead of excited
relieved when plans are canceled
unsure why you feel uneasy
Those feelings don’t mean you’re unlucky or dramatic. They mean your body is paying attention.
For teens, this awareness is especially important. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, which exists to remind us that prevention isn’t just about recognizing harm, but about learning to trust early discomfort.
Healthy relationships don’t rely on fear, pressure, or emotional guessing games. They don’t require you to ignore your instincts to keep the peace.
Related: Healthy Relationships in High School: What Teens (and Parents) Should Know
This Friday the 13th, it’s worth reframing the idea of bad luck.
If something feels wrong, it’s probably not fate.
It’s probably not superstition.
And, it’s definitely not a coincidence.
The Gabby Petito Foundation works to help people recognize patterns early, before discomfort becomes harm. You don’t need a holiday, a label, or a dramatic moment to trust yourself.
Sometimes the scariest thing isn’t bad luck. It’s ignoring what you already know.
